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Author: Bryant

Bad touch

December 16, 2004
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Blah blah Tom Wolfe writes bad sex scenes blah. Well…

I Am Charlotte Simmons is not a great book. It’s not a lousy book either. In any case, though, there’s nothing wrong with the sex scene in context. It’s written as clinically and as awkwardly as it is because Wolfe is using Charlotte Simmons’ voice in that scene, and from the first time we meet her it’s exceedingly clear that she uses dry, clinical language to separate herself from aspects of her life which make her feel awkward. It’s not Tom Wolfe writing uncomfortably about sex, it’s Charlotte Simmons thinking uncomfortably about sex.

Ray toothing

December 16, 2004
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Robin McKinley’s Sunshine is much like a Laurell Hamilton book, except that it’s suitable for people with good taste. The territory is familiar: more or less modern day, except there are creepy-crawlies (including vampires) running around and everybody knows it. Sunshine is set right after the war that occurred when that particular fact became public knowledge, I think — the timing is never made clear. There’s a young spunky heroine, there’s a vampire, there’s romance (not necessarily with the vampire), and so on.

The good: the prose is solid and Sunshine, the eponymous protagonist, is a fairly good character. Also good: the background doesn’t get drawn into place with a straight-edge. You have to pick up on what happened by paying attention, and I like a book that makes me think a bit.

The bad: weakish plotting in which characters don’t have to make choices. Inchoate ending, somewhat anticlimactic. It feels as though McKinley came up with an awesome setting concept and then wrote a documentary about it.

I liked it. The good is pretty good and the bad is forgivable.

Five redux

December 15, 2004
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In a futile effort to save Chris, show off for Brant, and feed my own ego:

Texcatlipoca Has Come From The North: a companion game to Huey Long’s Men of Action, set in AD 1000 or so in the Yucatan. Brave Byzantine warriors and their Viking allies battle the hordes of the god-king Quetzalcoatl. It uses D20 psionics rules, either Mindshadows or the WotC offering, depending on which is better. No magic. Plenty of Cathars.

The Seven Familes: there are seven great familes in the shadows of the world, struggling for dominance. Mystic flavor — perhaps stealing a little from GURPS Cabal. Ritual actions have subtle effects, so that getting married at the proper time with the proper flowers could provide luck for the family in certain endeavors for the next year, but there are no fireballs. One could think of this as roleplaying humans in the world of Nobilis, if one liked. Maybe use the Window system.

St. Cuthbert’s Men of Action: full-blown pulp adventure in a fantasy world. Despite the title, I wouldn’t actually want to use D&D. I don’t have a preferred pulp system yet… but I digress. The setting is Victorian in the cities and pulp as heck out in the jungles. Think Tarzan here. Humans and dwarves and elves are picking themselves back up again after a lengthy Dark Age; researchers are rediscovering old principles of magic, and the remnants of the First Age lie in the center of the forgotten cities, where mystical defense grids still wait for intruders. Good fun. At least one NPC named Hector.

The Legion: Trinity imagined as space opera. Described in detail here. Takes place in the Aeon Universe, but tilted somewhat to get the classic Jack Williamson space opera feel — not as grandiose as E. E. Smith’s books, but very steel-jawed. This is almost heresy, but since Trinity D20 makes it more attractive to play non-psions, I might use that over the original.

Ki-ki-ki-ki-ki: There is no magic in the world because the dolphins took it all to fight the good fight against the horrendous Cthulhoid creatures that live beneath the sea. As countless Call of Cthulhu scenarios prove, humans cannot be trusted with esoterica. There are two components to this game. In one, a small cadre of trusted human librarians retrieves copies of the Necronomicon and other such tomes from surface libraries. In the other, elite dolphin magickal squads combat Rl’yeh’s minons and the Mi-Go (who have long since eradicated and/or enslaved the native denizens of the Hollow Earth). The players take on one PC on each side of the water. Uses Call of Cthulhu mechanics.

Predictable luck

December 13, 2004
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In SI today, Peter King asks “How lucky are the Patriots to have Troy Brown (third interception vs. Cincinnati) to ride to the rescue of their secondary?”

Not lucky at all. The Pats have Troy Brown in that position because Bill Belichick has a policy of taking advantage of his best athletes whenever possible; this is why Mike Vrabel caught a touchdown pass in Super Bowl XXXVIII, and it’s why you see Richard Seymour lining up as fullback from time to time. Thus, Belichick asked Troy Brown to play a little defense during the pre-season this year, way before there was any hint of trouble or injury in the secondary. People thought it was a risky idea at the time. You’d think we’d have learned not to try and outthink Belichick by now.

The season begins

December 13, 2004
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The Golden Globe nominees have been announced. Is The Passion of the Christ anywhere in there? Nope. Probably should have been; it’s a spectacular movie with a questionable message, but I don’t think I want award shows to be in the business of judging messages. That’s the kind of thing that leaves Crash without an Oscar. (It did, however, win Best Alternative Adult Feature Film in the Adult Video News Awards in 1998, despite being released in 1996. I don’t know how that works. For some reason the award wasn’t blurbed on the DVD box.)

Where was I? Ah, yes. Biopics are hot. Most of the Best Drama nominees are biopics. All of the Best Actor (Drama) nominees are from biopics. Most of the Best Actor (Musical or Comedy) nominees are from biopics.

Natalie Portman got a nomination for Closer, but Julia Roberts did not. Clive Owen got one; Jude Law did not. Julianna Margulies, my high school’s most famous graduate, got nominated for television work.

Electoral plans

December 13, 2004
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So we’re gonna do the elections differently in 2008. I’ve been thinking about it. I have a plan.

We’re not going to vote for candidates. We’re going to vote for parties. You’ll cast one vote for a party, and you’ll be done. That will simplify things. Every party puts together a list of candidates, with their top candidate at the top and so on. Individuals can run too, but as you’ll see in a moment, it’s not a very good idea.

After everyone votes, we’ll total up the votes. X% of the people on each party’s list will be elected to Congress, where X% is the percentage of the total vote going to that party. So if 55% of the people vote Democratic, then 55% of Congress will be Democrats. Easy and simple. See why it’s bad for an individual to run? If you vote for an individual, then you’re only voting for one person and you have no say in the rest of Congress. Better to vote for a party.

This is not a parable.

Turnabout and stab

December 11, 2004
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A while ago I posted a review of K. J. Parker’s Colours in the Steel. I finally got around to reading the other two books in the trilogy. At the time, I said “I’m happy to have two more chunks of comfortable reading ahead of me.”

Two, yes. Chunks, yes. Reading, yes. Well-written, yes. Comfortable? Not to any notable degree. In the end, the Fencer trilogy is a tragedy about the Loredan family and their inability to love one another. I would still recommend them, but they are not in any way nice.