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Time to ring some changes

Funniest damn thing I’ve read in a while. Excerpt:

Madame Galadriel, famous Elf Queen,
Had a forbidding realm, nevertheless
Is known to be the wisest woman in Middle-Earth,
With a wicked pack of cards. Here, said she,
Is your card, the drowned Wizard,
(Those are the grey robes that were his garb. Look!)
Here is Eowyn, the Lady of the Horses,
The lady of battle.
Here is the man with many colors, and here the Staff,
And here is the one-eyed Sauron, and this card,
Which is blank, is something he searches for in your pack,
Which I am forbidden to see. I do not find
The Uruk-Hai. Fear death by Nazgul.
I see crowds of people, talking about a Ring.
Thank you. If you see dear Master Gamgee,
Tell him I bring the mallorn myself:
One must be so careful these days.

Oh, oh, the original thread has even more brilliance.

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