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Spider-Man, Ur-Woman

The New Rosetta Stone — parody or a serious challenge to Dave Sim for the misogyny crown? I honestly can’t tell.

My theory is simple and is, essentially, an analogy. By projecting the characteristics of “woman” onto a character which is more straightforward and more readily understood by the general population, I wish to make the behavior of “woman” comprehensible. I offer to you Spider Man as the best model for “woman.” My argument is sixfold:

  1. Spider Man wears tights.
  2. Spider Man wears a mask.
  3. Spider Man weaves webs.
  4. Spider Man has a sixth sense.
  5. Spider Man shoots strings.
  6. Spider Man can climb walls.

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