Month: July 2006

Meh, Junk. I’d had high hopes, but it turned out to be royally dull. Reporter gets stuck in a bad place, which is pretty clearly a metaphor for something cause it’s completely stupid for her to be stuck there, and encounters people, including someone who may or may not be a serial killer. Speeches ensue.

At no point is our heroine proactive. Nobody’s really proactive, in fact. There’s a vague attempt at pretending there’s a coverup. Russia decays. Etc.

Grade: D.

Awwww! Train Man! Awwwwwww!

OK, that was the sweetest little romantic comedy ever. Sort of like a Douglas Coupland novel without the reflexive defensive snarkiness, or like Megatokyo without the self-loathing. As S. pointed out, the characters were all treated with respect, even our adorable otaku (who should be played by Jason Schwartzman in the inevitable remake). It’s a nice love story that doesn’t depend on coincidence or amusing accident to move it along.

Also, and I think most appealing, it’s as much a story about the community that helps Train Man to his beloved as it is a story about the two of them — which is to say, they have equal importance. The Greek chorus of bulletin board users who give Train Man advice are given weight, personality, and characteristics of their own, which make them a real community rather than a plot device. In fact, one of my favorite parts of the whole movie was the clever staging business between Professional Man and Mac Girl. Nice and understated and eloquent.

Grade: A+.

I’m sure it’s not as if Japan is cranking out all the cool SF that we don’t get in the US, but man, Samurai Commando 1549 is completely the cool SF that we don’t get in the states. The premise: the Japanese Self-Defense Force invents time travel by accident, the guys they sent back start changing history, and another group has to go back and fix the problem before history (and modern Japan) are destroyed. Aw yeah.

When they get back there, of course, the commander of the first group turns out to have taken a bit more interest in the course of Japanese history than might have been wise, and yeah. Samurai with machine guns. Archers taking out unwary tank drivers. Helicopters strafing calvary units. Big explosions. And I’m not even spoiling some of the cooler shots.

The overall plot is kinda shaky, in that the villainous master plan is a bit questionable, but eh — you get the whole honor thing and the retired military guy who is pressed back into service and the bonds of respect and friendship that transcend time periods. So that’s all good. Most of the actors were fairly appealing, too. It’s an easy bunch of people to cheer and/or boo, as the case may be.

I think what really struck me, though, was that — aha. In the U.S. version, it would have been all about the adjustment to the new time period and so on and so forth. This movie just takes it for granted that people can figure out how to cope with a new time, which seems reasonable, and gets on with the business of setting up the fight scenes.

Also, cool explosions.

Grade: B+.

So you see a big budget Korean blockbuster like (say) Vampire Cop Ricky, and you get…

I liked Independence Day, but it didn’t stick with me. This was about the same. South Korea, from my limited experience, has less of a national character when it comes to film than Japan or Hong Kong; the technique and acting is on a par with and deeply influenced by Hollywood film, without the minimalism and immediacy of so much Japanese film or the visceral propulsion I associate with Hong Kong cinema. I know Korean cinema is not a new institution, but it feels to me like they’re still finding their way, at least as far as mainstream big budget stuff goes.

There was some interesting cultural stuff. Digital media players are clearly popular enough in South Korea so as to not require any introduction for a sight gag. Even more fascinating to me: the crime lord’s primary source of income was a cyber racing parlor. Yep, a room full of degenerate gamblers betting on a horse race that exists only in the computer, with the odds constantly reprogrammed by the crime lord. Funky.

So the premise of a crooked cop who gets bit by a vampire mosquito and only turns into a vampire when he has a hardon? You might not see that if it starred Owen Wilson. But you might, and it’d be entertaining, which is what this was.

Grade: B.

I didn’t know anything about Ultraman before seeing these four episodes. What I know now: there are five members of Team DASH, and they fight giant monsters, kinda like Kaiju Big Battel. Team DASH is a special group within the UDF. Giant monsters tend to ravage a specific area of Tokyo which is a cut below the classic Toho models.

Officer Kaito can turn into Ultraman Max, who is exceedingly tall and who kicks butt on almost everyone. He only gets to stick around for three minutes, though. And, um, that’s pretty much it.

Of the four episodes, the episode where a staff writer dreams he’s Officer Kaito dreaming he’s a staff writer was my favorite. Miike’s comedy episode with cat monsters (Fluffy, Mopsy, and Blackie, says S.) who eat memories also rocked. The other two were OK. Everything was low budget. I kind of want a toy King Ele. Nice way to finish off the evening.

Grade: B.

Shinobi is state of the art Japanese high budget historical romantic dramatic action. The story is not Romeo and Juliet with throwing stars, as tempting as it is to use that line. (So tempting I used it anyway.) However, it is fated lovers and there were throwing stars, so that’s all good.

There’s a minimalist plot which, for much of the movie, looked like it was going to leave me hanging in terms of story satisfaction. I’d been sort of middling satisfied as the various ninjas, each with their own unique fighting style — excellent fight choreography — battled and struggled and died. But then the final confrontation turns out to not be the two lovers; rather, their story transmutes into the driving engine for something which is in the end more important. And that rocked.

It actually made me wanna see it again, just to pick up on the real plot, which I think flows alongside the romance throughout the entire movie. There’s a bit early on when the leaders of the two ninja tribes are confronting one another alone. On first viewing, I thought it was an echo of the romance. Now I’m pretty sure there’s more to it than that.

The cinematography was absolutely gorgeous, aided immensely by those big craggy Japanese mountain vistas, and it avoided being glossy. I was expecting something at a sort of Azumi level of polish, but instead we got a subtly colored palette with depth.

The acting was decent. I think the two leads are both medium hot Japanese stars at the sort of Colin Ferrell/Kiera Knightley level, but they inhabited their roles well enough. Good action, as I mentioned. Kippei Shiina was particularly awesome as the ninja who isn’t immortal, “Just bad at dying.” Tak Sakaguchi was his usual excellent self.

Grade: B+.

I gotta stop seeing Thai movies unless they get really good reviews. Hell was kinda Saving Private Tootsie in, well, Hell. Lots of wandering around, no dramatic tension, and I didn’t really care if any of the characters made it back to the mortal world. Also I knew they would, because the big demon boss said “Let them out once they learn their lesson,” except he couched it in terms of karmic debt.

So after about an hour I gave up and went off and had sushi with S. instead. That was better.

I’ll give the movie points for a decent grotesque Grand Guignol vision of Hell. It was icky and looked completely unpleasant without being CGI’d out all over the place. The ghost demon children were particularly nice. But yeah, unpleasant people in an unpleasant situation does not make for a quality movie going experience.

Grade: Incomplete, but heading for a D.

This was, I think, a metaphor for the state of sports in Boston after the first two New England Patriots Super Bowl victories. The All Out High baseball team is of course the Red Sox, doomed to never win (at least in the eyes of the city). The All Out High soccer team, successful and snooty and possessed of innumerable chicks in miniskirts, is the Patriots. The struggle of the baseball team to make the Nationals under a goofy laconic manager is the struggle of the Red Sox to make the World Series under Terry Francona.

This interpretation is perhaps assisted by the guy in the Patriots jersey I saw in the line for Ultraman Max. Not sure. Also, I’m not sure what the ending of the movie says about what I should expect from Boston sports this year. Perhaps best not to dwell on it.

And come to think of it, Terry Francona didn’t wear a mask at any point during the World Series year. Maybe he’s not that much like the All Out High manager after all. (Yes, I did get another dose of masked wrestler.)

Anyways, I’d been hoping this would be cut from the same cloth as Cutie Honey; it was. Huge high energy broad comedy. There’s a big Shaolin Soccer influence as well, mostly in the sports wirework. Can’t begrudge a sports comedy that, and it’s not as if Shaolin Soccer wasn’t heavily influenced by over the top anime.

Fun romp. I liked it immensely.

Grade: A.

I find most movies advertised as “so bad it’s good” don’t fulfill the latter term. Three MIghty Men was an exception. The print sucked, the music was laughable, the acting wasn’t, the fight scenes… actually, the fight scenes were kind of imaginative, but they were imaginative at about half-speed. Captain America’s actor knew some gymnastics, so we got that.

The Spider was defeated, by my count, six times. No explanation given. Not a lot of explanation of anything, really, except the reason why our heros wore masks. (“The Spider is like a child; masks send him into a rage and he will try and kill us. Also, my costume is bulletproof.”)

Grade: B as entertainment, D- as a movie.

This was, I think, a metaphor for the state of sports in Boston after the first two New England Patriots Super Bowl victories. The All Out High baseball team is of course the Red Sox, doomed to never win (at least in the eyes of the city). The All Out High soccer team, successful and snooty and possessed of innumerable chicks in miniskirts, is the Patriots. The struggle of the baseball team to make the Nationals under a goofy laconic manager is the struggle of the Red Sox to make the World Series under Terry Francona.

This interpretation is perhaps assisted by the guy in the Patriots jersey I saw in the line for Ultraman Max. Not sure. Also, I’m not sure what the ending of the movie says about what I should expect from Boston sports this year. Perhaps best not to dwell on it.

Anyways, I’d been hoping this would be cut from the same cloth as Cutie Honey; it was. Huge high energy broad comedy. There’s a big Shaolin Soccer influence as well, mostly in the sports wirework. Can’t begrudge a sports comedy that, and it’s not as if Shaolin Soccer wasn’t heavily influenced by over the top anime.

Fun romp. I liked it immensely.

Grade: A.